Getting dates is hard. Getting dates online might be even harder. It’s difficult to get someone to be attracted to you through a few pictures and a small amount of text. However, it’s possible, especially on free hookup apps. But you need to optimize your presence there in order to get people to go out with you.
Here are some tips:
The main picture on your profile should be the best one. It needs to show off all of your best assets and also show a bit of who you are. People love pictures and they learn best by taking in visual cues, as you can see in this article. So, take some time to choose a good picture to represent you. Ideally, it should be a headshot. It may take a few hours to actually create a good picture that can attract other people, but it’s going to be worth it when you get plenty of dates and hook up opportunities.
Use plenty of pictures too. There should be one of your full body, one of you with friends, one doing something that you love and so on. Keep in mind that just adding ten pictures of you in different positions taken in the same hour won’t be appealing. You have to show who you are and tell a story through your pictures. Your lifestyle may not seem that important when all you want to do is hookup, but people are looking for interesting people, not bores that they’ll have nothing to talk about with. So, be open and do your best when it comes to images.
Flirt and play
People give out plenty of cues when they like someone – especially in person. Over the dating service of your choice, it might be more difficult, but it’s still possible. There will be no smiling, touching or leaning in, but there are plenty of other ways to show that you are interested, and also recognize when someone’s interested in you.
In the online world, you have to use words, emojis, and other similar stuff to show your emotions. This means that when you’re talking to someone you like, you should use exclamation points, emojis and nice words that show what you mean. Of course, don’t use too many of those, otherwise, you’ll seem like a teenager. Flirt a little bit, be playful, ask the right questions. Of course, start with some light, G-rated flirting and move on to racier flirting if the other person seems interested.
Don’t start with small talk, it will bore the other party and it won’t get you a date. Read their profile, see what they like and then ask them something about it. This is a much better starter that will enable you to appear confident and interesting as well.
Don’t make lists
You’ll be surprised that people still do this in their online profiles. They’ll create a list of traits that they want their partner to have – no exceptions. And this is completely wrong when you want to hookup. Even worse is when you make a list of traits you definitely don’t want your partner to have. You will not scare people you don’t want to date off – in fact, you’ll invite them to message you. But you will also appear condescending and unlikable to the people that you really want to attract.
Stay positive and focus on your profile. Don’t exclude anyone. You’ll have plenty of time for that once you actually start getting messages. And who knows, maybe someone you really don’t want to see in your DMs will be the person you enjoy hooking up with the most.
So, the key is to pack a lot of punch in a small, well-organized piece of text. Be economical and grab attention by being concise.
Write small paragraphs with short sentences and each should be focused on something else, depending on what you want to say. This way, everyone can have an easy time reading about you and getting to know you without wasting a ton of time.
The same goes for messaging. Don’t send a huge block of text as your first message. In fact, your first few messages back and forth should be short and simple. Then, as you move on and talk more, the messages can increase in size.
Look at the competition
There’s nothing wrong with knowing who you’re up against. In fact, it can help you get some intel on what to change and improve on your profile. Take a look at other profiles. See what they have to say. What is their success rate? Are they standing out? How? Who would you be the most attracted to if you were on the other side?
Keep in mind that you should only look at the technical details. How pretty or handsome someone is probably having a play in how many respondents they get, but it’s not crucial. You can’t change yourself right away and have better pictures. That’s not how it works, even though free hookup apps are full of handsome individuals. Plus, there’s someone for everyone. Not everyone is attracted to the traditional standard of beauty. Most people feel the most comfortable with people who are flawed and interesting in some way. So maybe you have a muffin top or a beer belly – but you may also have a beautiful smile someone would love to see.